Decoding Attachment Styles
Why you keep picking the same fights. Why you feel so needy or so smothered. Let's talk about why your relationships play out the way they do, and what you can actually do about it.
I’m your host, Annalisa Bahadur. I have a psychology degree, I’m a coach, and most importantly, I’ve been in the trenches. I used to have major anxious attachment. I know what it's like to feel that constant anxiety, to need reassurance, to feel like the relationship is always on the brink of collapse.
But I did the work to move toward secure. And I’m now almost five years into a happy, stable relationship with a recovering avoidant. I’m not talking theory from a textbook. I’m talking about what actually worked for me and my clients.
This podcast is about attachment theory, stripped down to the basics. No fluff, no fancy language. Just straight talk about how your early wiring affects your adult relationships.
In each episode, we break down the four attachment styles - Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Fearful-Avoidant.
We'll look at how they show up in your dating life, your friendships, and even at work. You'll hear real stories and get practical steps you can use right now.
We focus on two main tools: empathy and boundaries.
- Empathy to understand why you and the people you love act the way they do.
- Boundaries to protect your own energy and stop cycles of drama and hurt.
This isn't about blaming your parents or your exes. It's about giving you a roadmap to better relationships. You'll learn how to identify your patterns, communicate what you really need, and build connections that feel solid, not stressful.
If you're tired of the same old problems and you're ready for real change, you're in the right place.
Bonus- every Thursday you'll have a chance to listen in on real people as they share their struggles as I coach them through their challenges. Each individual has agreed to have these session recorded using a pseudonym, and aired for your benefit.
Decoding Attachment Styles
Stuck in a Situationship? How Your Attachment Style Makes Breakups So Hard
She thought everything was fine. Then, he dropped a bombshell/ “I'm not sure I'm in love with you anymore.”
Trying to be understanding, she gave him an easy out. She said, “It's okay if we need to break up.”
But he wouldn't take it. He was confused. He wanted to keep trying.
And just like that, they were trapped in a exhausting cycle of push-and-pull-a classic anxious-avoidant trap-until he finally ended it for good.
Now, she's left heartbroken and overthinking everything. She's asking all the classic questions:
- How do I get over a breakup when I still have feelings?
- What does it mean when he says he loves me but isn't in love with me?
- Why do I keep attracting emotionally unavailable partners?
- Is there any chance of getting back together?
If this story hits home, you're not alone. These painful patterns often point directly to our attachment styles.
In this recorded session, we sit down with Sarah to understand her anxious attachment style and how it showed up in her relationship. We'll break down-
- The hidden signs of an anxious attachment style.
- How fear of abandonment can accidentally sabotage your love life.
- Practical steps for healing a broken heart and creating secure attachment.
- How to stop the cycle of on-again, off-again relationships and learn how to move forward for good.